Vulgar language warning. If you don’t like other words for girl bits, you should probably skip this post. It’s a conversation my son and I had on the way home the other day. The girls didn’t say much but were keen observers. I’m wondering if it wasn’t a bad idea to talk about this in front of them. I guess I’ll know when a really inappropriate word pops out of one of their mouths.
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Son: Hey mom, is pussycat a bad word??
Me: No, it’s not a bad word.
Son: Well, D______ says it’s a bad word.
Me: Well, it’s not.
Son (sheepishly): What about the word “pussy” by itself????
Me: Okay kids, I’m going to do some cussing. Remember that some of these words are adult words. Okay?
Three VERY INTERESTED kids: Okay.
Me: You guys know the word “butt” right? You know that “ass” means the same thing, right?
Six giant eyes: Right.
Me: Well, pussy is kind of the same thing. By itself, it also means a body part and it’s a bad word.
Son: Well, mom, which body part????????
Me: It’s means a girl’s front butt* and it’s not a good word to say. Got it??
Three kids with giant squid eyes and open mouths: Got it.
Son: So it’s okay to say pussy when you say pussycat but not by itself??
Me: Yup. But you know it’s a very bad word, right? No more saying it okay?
Son: Got it. Is it kind of like how you can HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL-icopter? And HEELLLLLLLLLLLLL-o? And beaver-DAMMMMMMMMMMMMMM And ASSSSSSSSSSSSSSS-k? And ASSSSSSSSSSSSSS-hole. No, wait, sorry mom. That one really is a bad word. *giggle, snort* Sorry. Really, mom. Sorry.
Me: siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh.
*My girls call their butt their “back butt” and the front the “front butt.” It made sense at the time but seems a little weird for my girls to be calling that part their “front butt,” but vagina, urethra, and vulva seem even more crass. The science teacher in me cringes when I hear “front butt.”
26 comments:
*giggles* aren't kids funny? I don't have kids of my own, but I'm the eldest of five children so I've watched them grow up. The things they come out with! My mum still tells me off when I say 'crap'! lol
Ashley x
Possible vulgar response...
LOL That's funny to me. My oldest was 4 when my youngest was born. My oldest was really curious as to how the new baby was going to get out of my belly. Seeing as how I like to avoid everything I possibably can, I just told the child that the new baby was going to come out of my butt. I thought nothing of it.
Fast forward two years. Apparently, my oldest, who is now 6 and a half, was telling all her school friends the other day about how her little sister came out of moms butt.
Nice.
I am in total hysterics over here... you handled the topic very well. but I now have tears squishing from the corner of my eyes.
Growing up my mom called the girls private part teacup and unfortunately the boy's was called weener... umm yeah.
Thanks for the laugh. It's hard some times to know which way to go with these terms. Currently we use the term "potty" with a 4 and 6 year old it seems appropriate. The 8 year old calls it his private spot. The 6 year old has words that she have given certain items that I'm working on changing - a sore she has been known to call a "boobie" and her pinky toe or finger is a "winky". They both make me cringe and I've been working on changing her vocabulary.
Love it! I think it's so much better to at least talk about this stuff and give things 'names' rather than being vague about it. I was raised in a 'let's avoid the subject' household and I'm still horrified at the thought of talking about 'that stuff.' I'm in awe of my step-sister whose very open about talking about the 'bits' with her kids.
LOL! That's freaking hilarious!
As for "front butt", well, whatever parents and kids call it doesn't matter, as long as they're able to find a way to talk about it.
That might be the greatest exchange I've ever heard! I think I like your kids. :)
OMG - I was laughing so hard. I have 2 boys, and we have been very frank and very correct about what to call their "bits" but have avoided "girl bits," other than discussing that girls don't have what boys have. Without the need to talk about it (i.e., no baby sisters or girl cousins to see at diaper changes), I have found it difficult to face the idea of a little boy saying "vagina" or "vulva" on the playground.
funniest thing I've heard all day Thanks!!!!!!!!!
...and this is just the first of these types of discussions you will have...ah viewing the world through a child's eyes...
Patrick is awesome....and way too smart for his own good!! LOL!!
That's too funny, these kids now, are soo smart!
When I first had my newborn daughter, I was changing her diaper when her 2year old brother ran off to tell his father, I broke her wee-wee, lol!
OMG, I'm laughing my ass off! (oh wait, it that my back bottom, or front bottom?) anyway, hysterical!
OMG...I'm so laughing so hard!! My DD always used highnee for both, and occasionally her highnee would "burp"!! Gotta love the little ones :)
I'm glad you discussed it with them like that. Even in my mid-30s I still have memories of grown-ups laughing at me when I asked questions like that. I know now that they just thought it was cute but it made me feel very ashamed and I didn't want to ask questions anymore.
Beautiful. I hope the driving wasn't tricky as well!
I love the pictures you paint - your kids with their giant squid eyes.
Front butt is simple, unambiguous and specific enough for most purposes a small girl is going to need to talk about it for. And a little bit more technical than the ever popular 'lady town'.
Unambiguous and specific - that's pretty much the definition of scientific terminology, isn't it?
Why do kids always want to have these conversations when you're driving? (My theory is the absence of eye contact is comforting).
Love your posts. Always entertaining! Thanks
Funny! I've always said our kids would be hilarious if we weren't responsible for how they turned out!
LMAO!! Or should I say LMFBO?
good grief, kids are funny!
I havent laughed so hard in a longggg time!! Omg. Thanks for sharing that!
This is a great post. Since my son and daughter are now 16 and 18, many moons have passed since we had these kinds of discussions. Oh, those were the days.....
Like some others who have commented, I grew up in a household where you'd think we were all robots and had mechanical "parts," if we had any "parts" at all. My cousins, on the other hand, had doctor parents, who reminded their kids to brush their teeth when they had "halitosis." Let's just say that I learned all the proper technical terminology from them.
LOL I enjoyed this very much. Diane E and I discovered that we are long lost sisters...in our family we didn't talk about any of this stuff. To this day (I am the youngest at 54), s-e-x does not exist! :-)
It's also permissible to use the word "pussycat" when addressing or referring to a feline. Actually, we have three pussycats, and sometimes refer to them with the shorter word (but not in front of others). :-)
Brilliant! LOL. I'm CRACKing up about the Assssshole part! Absolutely brilliant. Out of the mouths of babes!
I know girls I've nannied in the past have often called their parts front bum and back bum. Whatever the family feels comfortable with!
That's hilarious. I cringe when my kids want to have those kinds of conversations at restaurants or while standing in line at the grocery store. lol.
I also have twin girls and they call their girl parts "pee butt". I think I like "front butt" better!!1
Hilarious... Somehow, with my daughter, it became "front fanny." Which is ironic considering that, to some people, "fanny" means "front butt" anyway!
I have to admit that to me, "front butt" refers to a very unfortunate anatomical feature that can be seen on extremely obese people in stretch pants. Not nice, I know!
OMG i cracked up at front butt.. sorry! haha!
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